friends comments

dear jo,
my friends are commenting on my behaviors and they are saying that am acting weird and it is very obvious. am not sure about it ...i thought am sooo coool and stuff but it seems that i should keep better care on my actions and what am talking about...... this aint good because am insecure without their comments , so i shouldnt be more bothered about what am doing and saying....but after all i think this is wat friendship is all about isnt it?!! but am still annoyed but not from themselves more like from myself ...how come am acting weird and i cant see it. pray for me jo . it seems that i need the prayers real hard

i shouldnt care

dear jo,
      check this part of a story that i just imagined.........


 she found herself standing infront of him...yes him the love of her life or so she thinks........ she looked at him coldly and said "hey...how are you doing?" he answered cautiously "fine! u??! "
-"great...nice meeting you" and started to go
-"why do you act as if you dont care!!!" he shouted behind her
she turned around slowly and said furiously "because i shouldn't!!"
- "but you do!!" he said in a surprised  tone
at that point she was really angry she moved fast toward him and said in a low scary voice "so you know that i do care!!! then what the hell is wrong with you!!! it seems like all that matters to yu that i keep on caring so you can feel good " there was a long awkward pause she was doing all she can to stop her tears from skipping her eyes.... no matter how hard she tried a tear eventually escaped which made her even more damn angry "just go away" she said slowly ""am on the mission of forgetting you and it won't take long, do you know why...because you don't deserve" she added..........now she wasn't just angry with him she was even angrier with herself because he sounded bitter .................. he didnt move not a step and even didnt have the guts to speak and explain himself....so she turned again slowly and moved away....she was so tired and thick and she moved really slowly........it seemed like ages before she finally reached the door of her home.....
                                                                   the end

first day syndrome

Dear Jo

have i ever told you how much i hate first days??!! okay ,here I go.....i hate first days sooooooo much, and i hate how i become grumpy, sad,emotional and dramatic..........i never enjoy myself or feel that it's a start of a new adventure...i uusually feel that am an outcast and that i will never fit in and home sick.............today was one of thoose days ....i was in complete despair when suddenly of no where a friend called me , we took the bus together home, she lives near me.............we bought a cocktail together , talked about books.....i returned home perfectly happy...thank God for my friends

It takes two

Dear Jo,

why does it always takes two?? it takes two to talk, two to have a good walk, two to dance and two to love. the sentence "it takes two" has been coming into my mind so much this week. where is my other one?? where is the one that will make us two. still waiting , still wishing it wont just be a dream.

Dreams

Dear Jo

Am so disappointed in myself, today I had so much to do, and I overslept. the real story was that i had this dream about having an old bookstore that needs some work to be great and I was so happy in the dream that I didnt want to wake up to face reality. And when i woke up at last, I was so depressed that it wasn't true.

Not just a hospital visit!

Dear Jo,

It is 15 min to 3:00 a.m. , I don't know why i love writing late at night and all the great ideas always appears when am so sleepy. Today I was visiting my friend's mom who is sick in the hospital. She was admitted in the ICU. The funniest thing was that we kept laughing so much that my other friend couldn't believe what the hell were we doing. Am full of hopes for both my friend and her mom. This hospital visit made me think what am I doing in this world, and what is my destiny and whether I am prepared to live my life alone or not and how much i love this dear friend. Meanwhile i keep waiting , waiting for everything for buses, career opportunities and love. I usually hate waiting but now after a long day of waiting am full of patience, not sure why?? Enough for today. Jo pray for me

who is Jo?

"Jo's ambition was to do something very splendid. What it was, she had no idea as yet, but left it for time to tell her, and meanwhile, found her greatest affliction in the fact that she couldn't read, run, and ride as much as she liked. A quick temper, sharp tongue, and restless spirit were always getting her into scrapes, and her life was a series of ups and downs, which were both comic and pathetic." page 36 from the book........ this is how Alcott describes Jo March. Anyone who knows me for some time would know that am a copy of Jo and that this phrase fits me so good at it does for her. That's why in dark times or in very happy ones I feel I owe her so much because her story inspires me ever and always. As a result of that feeling i always scrap some notes addressed "Dear Jo".